First, Ask Yourself: What Example Are You Actually Setting?
That’s the real question. Because “leading by example” is noble in theory, but in practice it often just means doing more. More tasks, more involvement in the day-to-day, more time in the weeds. And when that happens, your leadership can’t elevate — and neither can your team’s.
You become known as the person who’s always in the trenches. And while that might feel productive, it signals something to your team that you probably don’t intend: that leadership is just relentless self-sacrifice.
The Working Harder Trap
Here’s the model a lot of leaders unconsciously follow: work harder, not smarter. They tell themselves, “I can just do it faster and better myself” — and honestly, sometimes that’s even true! But it doesn’t matter.
If you’re taking over tasks that your team should be doing, you’re not helping them grow. You’re just filling a gap — and in doing so, you’re creating a ceiling for yourself and for the people you lead.
Your team needs to be able to do things. And you need them to be able to do things so you can step up and lead at a higher level.
Servant Leadership Doesn’t Mean Doing Everything
There’s a real and important servant dimension to leadership. But here’s the distinction: serving your team doesn’t mean sacrificing yourself at every turn. It means enabling them to grow and develop.
If you’re constantly in execution mode, you’re not serving your team well — even if it feels like you are. True service as a leader looks like creating the conditions for others to succeed, not just handling everything yourself.
The Shift: Lead by Expectation and Empowerment
So what’s the alternative? Two words that get thrown around a lot but are worth sitting with: expectation and empowerment.
Think about what you can genuinely expect from your people. Not just the tasks — the outcomes. What priorities actually matter? Are you communicating those clearly? Are you holding people to them?
And then ask: how am I modelling priorities as a leader, rather than just modelling effort?
That’s the real version of leading by example. Not “watch how hard I work” — but “watch what I choose to focus on, and why.”
Your Action Item This Week
Stop and reflect on this question: Where am I leading by doing, versus leading by modelling priorities?
That distinction will tell you a lot about where your energy is going — and where it needs to shift.
About Monday Myth Check
Monday Myth Check is a weekly dose of reality where Jono Brake holds up commonly held leadership beliefs and asks the question “What if this was not true”. You can find the weekly videos and other posts by following Jono Brake on LinkedIn or following The Forged Leader, as well as on Youtube @jonobrake.
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